


Kairos (Drive)

by Cerdic519



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Happy Ending, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-08
Updated: 2013-09-08
Packaged: 2017-12-25 23:53:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,712
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/959098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cerdic519/pseuds/Cerdic519
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean has a moment of realization that he is about to lose the man he actually loves. But is it too late?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kairos (Drive)

The Ancient Greeks had two words for time. Chronos referred to sequential (i.e. regular) time, where things happened normally. Kairos, on the other hand, was that special moment when time seemed to stand still, the life-changing instant when someone takes a critical decision as to which road to take next.

For Dean Alexander Winchester, his particular kairos came when his best friend in the whole world drove him home to the music of, appropriately, The Cars.

 

It all began as things Deanish often did, with a party. Dean liked to think he was the life and soul of any get-together (which he often was), and the times when he didn’t take someone attractive home at the end of the evening – male or female, he wasn’t picky – were few and far between.

This particular party, hosted by the unstoppable Ash, was no exception. Dean had already collected the phone numbers of three girls and one guy, and was considering the possibilities of a fifth for his list when he became aware he was being stared at. He looked up, and saw….

Cas?

His friend was staring at him from across the room. The laser-like Cas stare, totally oblivious to social norms, or more likely just not caring. Judging by the fact he was still in that god-awful trench-coat, he must have not long arrived. And now he was moving rapidly towards Dean, the drunken revellers mysteriously parting like the Red Sea before him. Dean briefly considered trying to fend him off, but his friend’s first words when he reached him did more to sober him up than a bucket of icy water with the ice-cubes still in it (which reminded him, he still owed Sammy for knowing how that felt).

“Sam says your father is coming home early tomorrow morning.”

“Shit!”

The thought of an angry John Winchester arriving home to find his eldest son drunk was a chilling one. Dean had barely sobered up the last time he came home, and had avoided detection only by taking a very long bath that ended with him reeking of lavender (Sammy still kept reminding him of that, the bastard!). If he didn’t get home and start getting the alcohol out of his system right now, he’d be toast tomorrow morning. Dad might even take back the Impala!

Outside, Dean brushed past Castiel and hurried over to his Baby. He fished for the keys in his pocket, only to find to his horror that they weren’t there. He had a few moments of blind panic, before he heard a faint jingling from behind him. Damn him! Castiel, the eternal ninja, must have filched them from him as he’d brushed past.

“Gimme those!”

“You’re too drunk to drive, Dean”, Castiel said firmly. “I’ll take you home in my car, and we can pick the Impala up tomorrow.”

“I’m not being seen in some damned Prius!”

“Then you either call a cab or start walking. Because I am taking your keys with me.”

Dean made a grab for the keys, but his friend neatly evaded him, and the next thing Dean knew, he was several spaces over and getting into his own car. Swearing under his breath (because the last time he’d sworn in Castiel’s car, the bastard had actually made him get out and walk for a few blocks) he followed him round, and slid grumpily into the passenger seat.

He was just thinking that his evening couldn’t get much worse when Castiel switched on his stereo, and a familiar tune began to filter through the car. Now Dean knew for sure that Castiel was cross with him. He only got the Drive treatment when he’d seriously annoyed his friend – forty-five minutes of The Cars' most chick-flick piece of music ever, on an endless loop.

Who's gonna’ tell you when,  
It's too late,  
Who's gonna’ tell you things,  
Aren't so great.

You can't go on, thinkin',  
Nothing's wrong, but bye,  
Who's gonna’ drive you home,  
Tonight.?

Cas, Dean thought sleepily, sinking into the comfortable passenger seat. He’s the one driving me home tonight. Hell, he’s the one driving me home far too many nights. Nights when I should be home looking after Sammy, not foisting him off on some study date – even if it is with Jess - so I can go out and get laid again.

He stole a look at his friend.

His friend.

It must have been something in the alcohol, because for the first time in his life Dean actually seemed to be thinking clearly. He didn’t actually have any other friends. He had loads of acquaintances, and countless sleeping partners, but when it came to friends, people he could rely on, he had…

Cas.

He glanced downwards. In the recess between the seats there was a bottled water, a bottle of Dr Pepper, and a packet of his favourite iced biscuits. He knew full well Castiel didn’t really like the drinks at least. He could only have put them in his car for Dean.

For possibly the first time in his life, Dean felt small. He opened and quickly downed the water, then started on soda, being careful to stow the empty water-bottle in the rubbish bag that had also been provided. He split open the biscuits, and placed them open between the two seats. After a while, Castiel reached across and silently took one. His eyes did that weird crinkling at the edges thing that Dean knew was his version of a real smile, and for some strange reason something inside Dean’s gut tightened. He'd never felt anything like it before, but somehow he knew exactly what it was.

Holy shit! He was… in love?

With his best friend?

With the man driving him home tonight.

Who's gonna’ pick you up,  
When you fall?  
Who's gonna’ hang it up,  
When you call?

 

Who's gonna’ pay attention,  
To your dreams?  
And who's gonna’ plug their ears,  
When you scream?

He could see it now, with that terrifying clarity alcohol (or the sudden lack thereof) could bring. It was always Cas. He’d always been there for Dean and Sam, whenever they needed him, and they’d come to assume – God alone knows why – that he always would be. Why? Their mother was long dead, and their father well on his way to drinking himself into oblivion, yet Cas was the one constant in both their lives. He was more of a father to Sam than John had ever been, though he was actually almost their middle brother – three years older than Sam, eight months younger than Dean. Cas’ own family was if anything even more dysfunctional, but Dean had never had to ask twice for any favour – indeed, like tonight, the favours often came without asking.

Cas was always there for him. And he had never even noticed. He sniffed.

You can't go on, thinkin'  
Nothing's wrong, but bye,  
Who's gonna’ drive you home, tonight? 

Hell, everything was wrong with Dean’s life, but he knew – he just knew – that as long as he had Cas, he’d be fine.

The realization hit him so hard that he choked on his soda, earning him a concerned look from the driver.

“Are you all right, Dean?”

That gravelled voice cut through his thoughts, but couldn’t stop the awful truth from slapping him in the face again.

How much longer would he have Cas for? The boy was way smart; he had been in the year behind Dean when he'd transferred two years ago, but he’d been advanced a year. Dean knew he must have already applied to all the Ivy League universities. Someone as smart as him was bound to be accepted by any or all of them, whilst Dean had been lucky to get a place at Kansas State. And that only because Cas had virtually done his application for him, even persuading Mr. Henriksen – Henriksen, for goodness’ sake, who openly hated Dean – to write a letter of recommendation for him.

Who's gonna hold you down,  
When you shake?  
Who's gonna come around,  
When you break?

You can't go on, thinkin',  
Nothing's wrong, but bye,  
Who's gonna drive you home, tonight?

Castiel pulled the car over.

“Dean, you are shaking. What is wrong?”

Oh no, he was actually going to cry. In front of the man he knew he had always loved, he was going to be a complete girl, and break down in tears.

“Nothin'!” he huffed, turning away.

Castiel, damn him, turned him gently back, then offered him a tissue. Dean blew his nose on it, feeling more ashamed every minute.

“You must hate me!” he gulped. “I’m nothin' but trouble!”

“You are, Dean”, Castiel said gently. “But I wouldn’t have you any other way. Although I hope you’ll be better behaved when you start college."

“I’ll try”, Dean said, in a small voice.

“Good.” Castiel sounded pleased.

Dean relaxed for a moment.

For a very brief moment, before his friend added, “because you're a grown man now, and I don’t want to have to do this every night.”

The alcohol must be kicking in again. Dean’s hearing was malfunctioning.

“What, you’re going to drive all the way from Harvard or Stanford just to save my sorry butt?" he muttered.

Castiel did the eye-crinkling-at-the-edges thing again, and Dean's heart managed to melt that little bit more.

“Hardly. I was hoping we might be roomies together at State, but if you want someone else….

Sobriety hit Dean harder than a brick wall on steroids. He shot up in his seat.

“What?”

“I’ve been accepted by Kansas State as well.”

“But… your parents…..”

“They were not exactly pleased”, Castiel admitted. “But I made my position clear. And they eventually agreed.”

“But why? I mean, you could go anywhere?”

And what came next was indeed Dean’s kairos.

“Because I wanted to be with the man I love.”

Dean froze.

“You? Love me?”

“Of course, Dean, I always have. I just knew I’d have to wait.”

“Wait for what?”

Castiel started the car again, and pulled back onto the freeway.

“You”, he said simply.

Oh, you know you can't go on, thinkin',  
Nothin's wrong,  
Who's gonna drive you home, tonight?

Who’s driving me home, Dean thought hazily. The man I love. The man I've always loved.

Cas.


End file.
